Are you a luxury traveler, backpacker or flashpacker, solo traveler,  mini-retirement traveler, adventure traveler, experiential traveler, experimental traveler or some other kind of traveler? In recent years there has been an explosion in such travel nomenclature to define and segment particular groups of travelers.  No one fits the mold precisely, let alone all the time. But it doesn’t matter because, ostensibly, there are two basic ways to get up and go – traveling to seek new experiences and traveling to seek escape.

Escape is a short term break from a long term problem. After returning from a week of relaxation, the daily grind begins anew. Barring life-altering poolside insights, the rats will still be racing and stress will resume its steady upward climb. A weekend getaway or a pampering cruise might be just what is needed to relax and unwind. But, in the end, the tension and stress that so pleasantly unwind will inevitably wind up until another travel escape brings another transitory respite.

Traveling to seek new experiences is an entirely different form of travel that addresses much different needs. Rather than being an escape from life, it is life. Being in a different place does not change who you are or how you act. It is the most fulfilling form of travel because it authentically represents your lifestyle and your values. It is about maintaining the same pace of life, albeit in a different place with different people.

When I get an urge to travel I like to think about these two types of travel. If I feel a burning desire to escape to a tropical sanctuary free of worries, I know my life is slightly out of balance. I may be working too hard or putting too much pressure on myself. A weekend getaway might be exactly what I need to unwind. But it will never fulfill me because my hectic life has led me astray from my core values. The travel that is most exciting is when there is an urge to see something new, to interact with people with different lifestyles and different traditions. This type of travel is invigorating, memorable and exciting.

The next time you feel an urge to travel, remember that if you are seeking to escape burnout, you will get a sunburn, I guarantee it!

The World Cup is a fantastic global event that unites people and gives the sport of football a deeper and more significant meaning that transcends the sport itself. And that is a good thing, because taken on its own, the sport of football can be alarmingly devoid of honor (how do those overpaid actors sleep at night?). But the international nature of the sport – anyone with a ball can learn to play – makes it the great equalizer. On the pitch, especially during the World Cup, any team can conceivably beat any other team. But what I find so refreshing about the World Cup is not the football itself, but rather the people of each country who join together to support their team and their country. The tears you see on television when a country crashes out of the tournament are very real and represent the collective grief of an entire nation that has invested so much emotionally during a very short period of time.

I look at these passionate supporters with a mix of sadness and joy. Here is why.

I hold 4 citizenships. My wife adds another citizenship to our family, further splitting my allegiances and diluting any sense of nationality I might have. Holding so many citizenships has its appeal of course, and drawbacks such as tax complications, military service and never-ending passport renewals are a worthy trade-off, in my mind. But the biggest drawback is one that I can never eliminate, even if I renounced 3 of my 4 citizenships. My heart will forever be torn. I will never cry for a country that crashes out of the World Cup. I will never feel part of something bigger, something that binds a nation together.

Yet, every four years, I am oddly drawn to the World Cup. I put my misgivings about the sport aside and marvel at the unity and passion shown by countries around the world. When a small country like Ghana advances deeper into the tournament and becomes a continent’s sole remaining hope, I cannot help but feel a sense of excitement for the country and its people.  I get a sudden urge to travel to these countries and share the moment with them. While I will never cry for a country, I certainly feel the joy that is felt by its people. This isn’t bandwagon hopping because I am never on a wagon to begin with. Rather, like a traveler, I am simply an observer who picks a destination to travel to where there is hope, joy and happiness.

I have always held a fascination for the mountains. The stunning vistas, panoramic views and crisp mountain air fuel a rush that escapes me during other travels. But this proximity to nature is not the only reason why mountains are so dear to my wayfaring heart. As all travelers know, great travel experiences come not only from where you travel but also from whom you meet and interact with. The best memories of a trip are almost invariably connected to the people I meet. And, in my experience, the people living in the mountains are some of the friendliest, warmest and most open people in the world. What’s more, this hospitality and friendliness are infectious. Other travelers seem to absorb this positive, heart-warming energy.

These people may not have many possessions or gifts to give, but they are certainly generous in kindness and hospitality. Living in the mountains means they may not have ever seen modern home comforts and technology such as heaters, TVs, internet games like partypoker or gadgets like mobile phones. However, they have something which so many other places don’t. They have a strong and kind community, which brings out the best in human nature.

A brief history of mountain people

Throughout history, life in the mountains has been harsh. Despite (or because of) the remoteness of mountain life, it was not possible to live without the help and support of others. While this remoteness forced a large degree of self reliance on people in the mountains, to survive and prosper, mountainous peoples have always had to be dependent on each other and also fiercely protective of each other. This tight sense of community helped mountain people survive the harsh conditions of isolation, long winters, short growing seasons and marauding invaders.

Now, of course, times have changed. Life for many mountain peoples isn’t the same struggle as it once was. Outsiders are no longer feared because they pose no threat to survival. But the strong bond between people remains. The sense of community is now apparent even to outsiders, who are now tourists and travelers, rather than threatening invaders hungry for resources. Within this expanded community, mountain people seem to be hard-wired to accept people and welcome them in their lives.

Lessons learned from the mountains

While people from the mountains are most certainly not “better” than the rest of us, I firmly believe that their place in the world and in history has brought out some of the best of human nature. Mountains are inspirational not just for their stunning beauty but also for their residents, who continuously inspire me to be equally warm, friendly and welcoming in my daily life.

As a kid growing up in Mexico, my head was constantly being rubbed by locals because they saw blond hair as good luck. Because I was a little kid, the locals were uninhibited when it came to touching my hair. I developed a defense mechanism by burying my head in my arms whenever I saw another good luck rub approaching. Eventually, as I approached an age where it was no longer socially acceptable to touch the hair of a random stranger, the practice stopped. This experience taught me at an early age that I would never be able to shake my gringo past and be accepted as a true local.

Is there such a thing as an authentic local experience while traveling? To me, having a local experience means blending in with the locals so that you can experience life exactly the way they experience it. After years of traveling across the globe, I would argue that it is not possible – as a tourist. And if the language or cultural barriers are too great, it will never be possible as an expat or “slow traveler” (which simply means you are an expat with restless, nomadic tendencies). No matter how authentic you think the experience is, you will always be the outsider looking in.

Sure, you can go off the beaten path. You can even go beyond that. But the further you venture away from the white socks and sandals, the more different and unique YOU become to the locals. At the end of the day, you will return to your hotel where you left your guidebook (because you wanted to see the real stuff and experience local life) to plan your next day of adventure. And the locals will go to their homes, where they will crawl into bed, look back briefly at the evening but mainly focused on tomorrow, with all the hardship and struggle it may bring.

But this is an argument that I don’t want to win. The fact is, I like having local experiences, however superficial they may be, because they are as close as I am going to get to the real thing. The fleeting glimpse into the hardships of a local is sobering and teaches gratefulness and humility. Drinking a beer and sharing a laugh and a dancefoor with locals in a bar is energizing and welcoming.

By seeking these experiences, our own crazy lives get put into a new perspective. We realize that our worries are not worries in the grand scheme of things and that we really ought to be doing more to help the world. The benefits of these experiences are huge. Just don’t kid yourself that this is authentic. Enjoy it for what it is – a serendipitous glimpse into local life with an emergency eject button in case things get too uncomfortable.

The Souks of Marrakech in Morocco are a market that will test and sharpen your skills at negotiating. The market, which is a disorienting maze of shops that winds through part of the old town adjacent to the Jemaa Al-Fna square, is full of textiles, ceramics, spices, ailments and cheap knock off goods. Shopkeepers have mastered the art of persuasion and use every trick in the book to convince you to part with your money. Bargaining is a big part of the game here and you need to be willing to play. You can expect a discounted price of over 80% here, but it will take some skill to avoid being taken full advantage of by these intrepid salesmen. This is as good a place as any to master the art of negotiation – or at least to get some invaluable firsthand experience in the art of selling.

Some of the many tricks you will encounter here include the following:

Personalization – I was wearing a North Face jacket when negotiating for a Tajine pot. The salesman looked at me, then at my jacket, and then proceeded to tell me that he owns a ski lift in the Atlas Mountains where the skiing is unbelievable. When I pressed him about the altitude of the lift, he answered carefully, 3,179m. Now, even if you don’t fall for this trick, he already achieved his goal by establishing a personal connection.

Oppression – One salesman insisted I would not be a good husband if I did not provide for my wife by buying her a scarf. He tried to make me feel guilty that I was haggling over a couple of Dirhams rather than focusing on making her happy. This is a dirty trick but it can work. Just remember, these are just tricks and you can get the same scarf in the next stall.

Guilt – Because the Souks are so fascinating, it is easy to get caught looking at a particular product, wondering what it is or what it does. This is where the salesman pulls you in. When I lingered at a spice stand, the shopkeeper patiently explained to me what each spice is, what it is used for, and what health benefits it has. At the end of this short education session, I felt more or less obligated to buy some of these spices. I even felt bad bargaining with him, seeing that he invested so much of his time.

Regain the upper hand

Ok, you will never have the upper hand, but you can take some steps to lessen the leverage of the merchant.

1. Start small

Hone your bargaining skills with some small items. Spend some time getting used to the process of bargaining back and forth and getting creative with your counter offers. The few Dirhams you spend here will probably be too much but practice makes perfect! As you get comfortable bargaining, move up to the items you actually want.

2. Start low

Learn the lower end of the merchant’s tolerance by testing with some absurdly low offers. If they laugh and turn away, you made such a silly offer that they didn’t take you seriously. Good. Now try again at another merchant with a slightly higher offer. If you get a counter-offer, increase your offer by a small increment, especially if the merchant slashed the original offer by a large amount. The goal here is not to get a deal, rather it is to get a feel for the true price. Being informed is the best way to level the playing field.

3. Walk away

There is nothing wrong with walking away from an offer. No matter how much time and effort you and the salesman have invested in the process, walking away is a perfectly acceptable decision. Sometimes it isn’t easy because you are tricked to feel emotionally invested, but stay calm and rational. The same product can be found elsewhere and the insights from this negotiation will make the next negotiation even smoother. Often, when walking away, you will find that your lowball offer is acceptable after all!

In the end though, no matter how well you think you did, remember, nobody in any market sells you something at below cost. A profit was definitely made. But enjoy the experience as you will be rewarded with not only some souvenirs from the famous Souks but also with some tools to becoming a master negotiator!

The following is an article reproduced here with permission from the Johansson Coaching Blog. There are many similarities between a martial art like Aikido and traveling, such as increased mindfulness and higher awareness of your body, mind and environment when immersed in a travel experience. In addition, learning an eastern art like Aikido at home is surely a great way to understand another culture, which makes traveling an incredibly rewarding experience.

Find out more about Malgorzata at her website or her Guru Profile Page.

“Aikido manifests the ultimate reality: the flowing spontaneous movement of nature within which is packed the unmatched power of ki. Its goal is the formation of the ideal human self unifying body and mind, realized through vigorous mental and physical training, and the attainment of dynamic life in both activities and stillness.”

Kisshomaru Ueshiba

For quite some time I sensed I would like to learn what the martial art is all about, but somehow I did not dare the first step. For the past few years I have been exploring a number of body and mind integration techniques and experienced their incredible power and wisdom. I have been moving between and enjoying two opposite poles: stillness and movement. I explored stillness through various meditations techniques, going deep into places, where all our universal power resides, discovering depths I never thought exist within myself. And, on the other hand, I explored the power of body movement – and was amazed how much power is being released through vigorous movement, dancing and improvising. I never thought of myself as an athletic person, but I found myself extremely enjoying dancing and various sport activities. So here I was: drawn to stillness and movement at the same time. I wanted to experience something, where I could combine both. And here it came: Aikido. I read somewhere that this martial art values both of these qualities. And then, magically, I kept meeting people, who were practicing Aikido, everywhere I looked Aikido word was starring at me. OK, Universe, I get it! I needed to try this.

So here I was: I did some research on Aikido dojos in my area. I called one dojo and they invited me for an introduction practice session. With eagerness I came to the first practice. The master Petra, training Aikido since 25 years, welcomed me at the entrance. Aged approx. 50, but looking extremely young and vigorous. After some other participants appeared (all of them experienced, with at least 5 years of Aikido practice), we started the training. We all sat at the mat and began with the silent meditation, followed by warming up exercises of the whole body. Then we were instructed to do a simple backflip. And then I thought: wait a minute, how long has it been since my last back flip? I guess the last time I did one was in the grammar school sport classes. Wow, I thought, but anyway, I trusted my body and backflipped. Surprisingly, my body still remembered this movement. What happened afterwards: I was basically included in the whole training with all those experienced participants. I was thrown into deep water! Scared at the beginning, I followed the flow. All the students were very patient with me, explained me various techniques and supported me. So here I was: backflipping, rolling over on the mat, attacking, being attacked, and experiencing the fluid motion of my own and my partners bodies. After two hours of practice I was exhausted, all muscles sore, but I was also very centered and at peace. Wow, I said to myself – this feels great. To my surprise, though, during this practice I realized also how tense my body was, and how little I actually trusted it. I am sure there is much more to come here with regards to my body awareness.

What amazes me the most about Aikido is that this martial art is actually not about fighting. In the classical fight we direct one strong energy against the other strong energy. And at the end the stronger energy wins. In Aikido one transforms the energy, which comes from the opponent, through certain techniques, making “the fight” a beautiful dance. Both the attacker and the attacked become one, fluid motion.

I am not sure how my adventure with Aikido will evolve. I definitely want to attend some other practice trainings and learn more about Aikido itself and about the wisdom of my own body. But, above all, this experience made me realise how much is possible, when we fully inhabit our bodies.

The beauty about travelling is the way it holds you in the moment. Almost as if you are in a deep state of meditation, your mind is present and your body is aware of its surroundings. When immersed in a captivating travel experience, your mind does not wander – it is still. You do not think about your grocery list, or the birthday present you need to buy. Your day job is completely forgotten.

That frees up space to take in all that is around you – the sounds, tastes, smells, sight and feel of your surroundings. This heightened awareness is what helps make travel experiences so memorable.

Some of the experiences I remember the most are those that involved all the senses, such as the following:

Romantic Dining in San Gimignano

As often is the case, the first dinner in a new country is especially good. Is the food really that much better than at subsequent dinners? Probably not, but the novelty of the environment makes it easy to live in the moment and forget your worries. Looking back at our first dinner in San Gimignano, a beautiful medieval town in the heart of Tuscany, I can still taste the wine and the excellent parmesan cheese, ruccola and Prosciutto appetizer. At this dinner, I was totally present and the memories are therefore especially vivid.

Scenic Drive on the West Coast of Mallorca

Often, a heightened awareness is achieved when your senses become reacquainted with long forgotten sensations. After a long winter that did not want to end, the sun and warmth of Mallorca created a greater sense of awareness in the body and mind. I remember feeling the rays of the sun shining on my face, the sound of the waves gently hitting the coast and the olive groves swaying peacefully in the Mediterranean breeze. On a late summer’s day, this might not have been so memorable. But taken in this context – after a long winter bereft of sun and warmth, the sense of awareness was extraordinary.

Fantastic Day Trip Hiking in the Alps

Hiking is a great way to experience life in the moment. The weight of your pack on your shoulders is hard to fathom, your legs burn from climbing steep precipices, and you long for small comforts like a piece of chocolate. This pain, however, forces you to stay in the moment. There is no where else to go. After a hard day of hiking up the mountain in Lech, Austria, the soup we ordered in the lodge exploded with taste. The soup, which probably came from a can, tasted so good because it felt so rewarding after the strenuous climb.

To me, the beauty about travelling is the heightened awareness of all that is around me. It is why the memory of a simple soup can linger for months or even years after eating it. Sure, this is possible at home too, but the change of scenery makes it so much easier to eliminate distracting thoughts and brings you into the present, fully aware of yourself and your surroundings.

Do you have travel insights to share? Contact us to write for the Mytripguru Blog.

We have all experienced it before. The panic, fear, or dread felt so acutely during a horrible travel experience gone awry. Everything that can go wrong does. And for that moment in time, you do not know how on earth things will get better. But then things turn around, you find a solution, and you live to tell about it. And how!

I have had a few of these travel experiences in my life and I can absolutely say that while I don’t wish to repeat them, they made me grow as a person and as a traveller.

Losing my passport while en route to Thailand

This one caused pure anguish. A friend of mine and I meticulously planned a trip through Thailand one summer after university. I prepared all my travel documents and put them in a document holder to be worn around the waist. On the way to the airport in Stockholm, I carelessly took it off and placed it in the seat pocket in front of my bus seat. When I realized the error of my ways, I was standing at the check in counter and the bus was long gone.

I wasn’t able to locate the bus until the next day, and when I did, the bus company said there were no documents to be found on the bus. I had no other choice but to cancel the trip completely.  Strangely, my documents turned up a couple of weeks later, but by then it was too late.

Falling through a skylight in Mexico

Another case of carelessness resulted in a severely lacerated hand, cuts on my legs and a mother who ordered a couple of extra strong Margaritas to pass the time while I was getting sewn up. I was 14, on a family vacation in Huatulco, Mexico. Prankster that I was (am), I decided it would be funny to give my family a scare as they left the hotel room. The hotel was built on the side of hill, so it was easy to climb onto the roof of the lower level rooms. I jumped into what looked like a well (to this day I don’t know what a well would be doing on a roof) that was covered in leaves and dirt. I quickly discovered this wasn’t a well, but an old, unwashed skylight made out of glass. My jump shattered the glass and I fell through. The cuts on my hand and legs resulted in a total of 60 stitches, masterfully sewn by a gynecologist who arrived to pick me up on his moped.

A romantic evening that turned out anything but romantic

When I travel, I tend to only book the first night’s accommodation and book the remaining nights on the fly. I like this because it lets me stay flexible and update my travel plans based on tips from locals and other travelers I meet. Normally, this results in a pleasantly serendipitous experience. On a trip to India several years ago, this strategy worked out a lot differently than I had hoped.

My wife and I travelled by ferry and rickshaw from the Gates of India in Mumbai to Murud, a beautiful beach town a couple of hours south of Mumbai. We arrived to discover that every single room was booked, and our hopes for a short respite from the crowds in Mumbai were dashed. Darkness was falling and we were out of ideas, other than sleeping under the stars. Luckily, and that is debatable, a friendly Indian who heard about our plight approached us to offer a room that he still had free. The room, which we paid a comparative fortune for, was an adventure in itself. Poorly lit, made entirely out of concrete, with bars on the inside of the windows and no running water, we pondered whether we would be locked inside.

But when we now look back at our trip to India, Murud has a special place in our memories. No matter where we are and under what circumstances, we can always say, “At least its not Murud!”

On a side note, Murud really is beautiful and you should visit if you are in the area. Just make sure to book in advance if there is a public holiday! See the end of this post for some photos of the beach in Murud, India.

Pain gives way to Happiness

Could these experiences have been avoided? You bet. They were all a result of carelessness and inexperience. But these things happen. Looking back, I tell these stories in a light-hearted manner, although at the time, they were anything but funny. In the end, such painful travel experiences create particularly vivid memories. Memories have a funny way of making the pain fade and instead give way to fond memories, gratefulness, and a strangely deep appreciation for these travel experiences.

Do you have travel insights to share? Contact us to write for the Mytripguru Blog.